Money can be one of the most emotionally loaded topics in any relationship. If you’re worried about rising bills, overspending after special occasions or an unexpected expense, talking about money can feel stressful or awkward. Avoiding the conversation doesn’t make the problem go away though.
Here are some tips on how to start an open, supportive conversation with your partner to help you get back on track with your finances.
Pick the right moment
Avoid bringing it up in the middle of an argument or an already stressful situation. Try to choose a neutral time when you’re both well rested.
Be honest and avoid blame
Share your feelings on the subject rather than pointing fingers It’s a shared challenge you’re facing together. Instead of saying “we spend too much and we’re in trouble”, try “I’m worried about our finances, could we have a look together and make a plan?”
Focus on shared goals rather than the past
Conversations often go wrong when they turn into a review of who did what. Set joint goals such as paying off debt, creating a budget or building an emergency fund and work together as a team.
Be open about what’s worrying you
Don’t hold back details that affect the bigger picture. Sharing things like “our credit card balance is growing” or “I can’t manage the bills on my own.” helps you both understand what needs attention.
Create a plan together
a simple, actionable plan may reduce money worry. We recommend:
- Creating a monthly budget
- List all your debts and noting the payments that are due
- You may want to speak to your creditors if you’re worried about repayments
- Reviewing your subscriptions and cancelling any you don’t need
- Agreeing to check in on your finances regularly
- Reaching out for debt advice if needed
Keep talking
One conversation probably won’t solve everything, so keep checking in with each other. The aim is to make money a topic you can talk about openly without anxiety.
If it doesn’t feel safe to talk
If discussing money feels unsafe, or you’re worried about how your partner may react, support is available You can contact the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247 for confidential advice at any time.
What you can do next
If you are struggling with debts call us on 0800 072 1206. We’re open from 8am – 8pm Monday to Friday and 9am – 3pm on Saturdays.
Alternatively, you can visit our www.payplan.com/police to speak to us via live chat or more information